Monday, September 26, 2005

I'm forced to recycle old stories...

...I've been so busy that I haven't had a chance to blog in awhile. In a nutshell, I'm doing great. One of my friends suggested I put the "Mouse" story on my blog page, it goes. I had just moved to Fresno a couple of weeks earlier...

Originally sent Fri, 27 Aug 2004 15:13:12 -0700 (PDT)

So this is how I started my day today. First of all let me preface by explaining that we do have a mouse. I've seen him, he's tiny but he's still...a mouse. Centuries ago man and mouse lived together in harmony but those days are gone. I want him killed, dead, gone! At night when I sit on the computer and listen to the Olympics on the TV behind me, I hear him. He's in the kitchen, he's in the pantry, he knocks things over and he's getting too bold. So I tell my roomie Sandy and she puts out some cheap sticky traps and is certain we are going to catch him, we even have old poison around and he'll eat that. I think he just ice skated on the sticky traps, we don't catch him and he's still disturbing my late night web surfing. He's a smart sucker. So I wake up yesterday and go turn on the tv and sit on the couch and I hear some rustling amidst some diaper packages next to the entertainment center, then OUT speeds this little gray thing, he heads over to the wall and through kitchen and into the back of the stove. I was dumbfounded. I did NOT just see a mouse. Oh NO HE DINNNIT! So when my heart beat comes back to an acceptable level, I call my mom and she's like, you have to kill him, you have to get rid of him...he'll breed, they'll be more...they'll be in your room. Nuff said. I call my roomie on lunch and she's just like oh, well ok, we'll have to get some more traps and blah blah blah. Sandy is not realizing the severity of this situation. I am still in shock of sharing a dwelling with a rodent. I'm still in shock of seeing him run through the living room. I must take matters into my own city boy hands.

So I hit Wal-Mart after work and I buy poison, snap traps and sticky pads that look like you can tow a truck with them, just stick 'em on your bumper. I'm going to get this mouse! We set up the traps (the kids had great fun helping me with the snap traps) and the kitchen is armed, it's's soon to be...the killing field.

I didn't hear him last night, he's waiting, he knows...he's planning his next move. I sit, I wait...I'm waiting to hear the snap trap, a shriek when he get's least him knocking something over but I hear's quiet on the Killing field tonight.

So I stumble out of bed this morning and walk into the kitchen and stop short, there he is, he's on the sticky trap right next to the oven. I knew I'd get him, I knew it, but it's early and I didn't want to touch it, ugh! So I went back to bed. When I got up later he had moved to the other side of the sticky trap and I thought, he's going to get out if he keeps that up. So I called my momma and she told me I had to either kill him or put it in a plastic
bag so he would suffocate and I didnt' want to do either and my mom was like you have to and I was like NO! and she was like yes! and I was like NO and she was like yes! and I was like NO and she was like YES! aaahhhh!!
So...I picked up the trap with the mouse on it with salad tongs, and the
mouse started shrieking and I started screaming and my mom was like,
just do it!! I almost peed. So I put him in a ziplock bag and threw him in the garbage can out back. Hell of way to start my day I tell you.
So now we should have no more mouse problems, I hope he was the only one because I really don't think I can do that every morning before breakfast. So that's the lastest from the country, I hope you are all well...and mouse free.


  1. just say "NO" to prequels...... :)...Estevan

  2. LOL I have this image in my head of you hoping around your kitchen screaming holding that mouse trap with a pair of tongs. *snort*

  3. @becullen it was not my most manliest moment. ;) peace