Friday, February 18, 2011

Random Memory.

Have you heard of The Sea of Tranquility? I know it's a spot on the moon or something like that, but I'm talking about the Sea of Tranquility of our dreams. A long time ago, I read in a book that the Sea of Tranquility is where you and someone you love meet in a dream. So technically, you both have the same dream at the same time and that means you met on the Sea of Tranquility. That is your partner in life. Supposedly.

Also, years ago, I went to college in New Mexico near Albuquerque. It was an all Indian college, and it was my first time away from my family, and to say it was scary for me is an understatement. While I was there I met a girl, her name was Monica and she was the prettiest girl on campus. She had a boyfriend though, he lived off campus and he would come pick her up on the weekends. Monica and I got very close, fast. Yes, I was gay but there was something about her that caught my attention. She was sexy and fun, and so self confident. Like me, she didn't want to be another "Native cliche". She was determined to better herself. She was also Apache and she sure had a wild side. We flirted like crazy at first, and then later we would just stay up and talk for hours, often cuddling while we talked. We never "went there" but she was definitely ready if I ever wanted to make my move. Her and her boyfriend broke up and we started seeing each other, to this day I don't know if I'm the reason...they had problems way before I entered the picture. She always said I wasn't, because I kept telling her I didn't want to be the reason.

One Saturday after lunch we went back to our respective dorm rooms to take a nap. The night before, we had stayed up really late just talking and laughing. During my nap I had this dream where she and I were being chased by aliens. We were on the beach and they chased into a cave, they wanted to take her from me and I wouldn't let her go. We found an exit and all of sudden there was a bunch of hay there and it caught on fire and Monica screamed because our exit was blocked. I remember stopping and just looking at her and telling her, it'll be okay, I wasn't going to let them take her. I think finally after more running and dodging I just woke up.

I layed there on the bed and all I could think of was Monica but I couldn't move, the dream was so intense...not the details of what happened but the strength of the emotions I was feeling. Fear, strength, love, intense. After a few minutes there was a knock on my door, it was Monica. She was crying and I just hugged her, and told her it would be okay. I knew, I just felt it (wow, I'm kinda tearing up right now) that she had the same dream. She started telling me she had this dream and her and I were being chased by aliens, and they were trying to take her, and we found an exit but all of a sudden there was hay there and it caught on fire. After I finally calmed her down, we both described our dreams and they were exactly the same. Even the point where we both woke up was the same.

I told her about the Sea of Tranquility and she just cried. We both kinda knew we wouldn't be together, but now we would ALWAYS have that moment.

I left the school for various reasons a short time later, we did keep in touch for awhile after that. I'm not sure what happened but her tone changed after I left, I tried to be encouraging and supportive but last I heard I think she had eventually dropped out of school, moved back to the rez and had gotten pregnant. Although, I heard that from a girl who had a crush on me while I was there and was jealous of Monica. They were all jealous of Monica though, why she ever picked me I do not know. She remembers the first time she saw,haha. I started the semester late so when they took roll and I said "here", she didn't know who I was. She said remembers looking down the row to where I was sitting and seeing a handsome boy with the saddest, yet kindest eyes and she knew she needed to know me. She also said I looked scared! LOL, I probably did.

Not sure what brought that memory up today, but it's one of my favorites. ;) peace
p.s. I also dated a psycho Eskimo girl while I was there, that b*tch was crazy! But that is for another time.


  1. Sweetie, thanks for sharing that memory. I can see why it's one of your favorites. You two obviously had a connection. Have you ever thought about trying to find her just to reconnect/see what she's doing. You two were close, and I bet she'd like to hear from you.

    Now, I am not going to lecture you (much) about that whole "why she ever picked me I do not know" stuff. I'll just say that of course a fabulous girl picked you. You're fabulous!

    Now, I'm going to be looking for that post about the pyscho Eskimo girl. ;)

  2. OMG I was all ahhhh then the end made me choke on my root beer. You must share psycho Eskimo girl story. Nice post. It's weird how memories seem to pop in our heads like that.

  3. @eyre I have thought about looking her up, but I like memory of her as she was back then. Does that make sense? I don't want to "lose" that by seeing what she's up to today. She was my first love. ;) peace

    @becullen LOL you have no idea, this chick was crazy! I'll post it soon. ;) peace

  4. Hon, I understand. You want to keep that memory a good one, and finding her might change it somehow. Thanks for sharing your first love with us. *hugs*